I told how I had turned self-doubt into self-assessment and used this to move forward through uncertainty.
As a result, I gained positive audience feedback, LinkedIn recommendations plus three new clients bringing in several thousand pounds! If you have not read Part One, I encourage you to first click here and read it.
Following on from Part One, here are 7 ways to grow forward and achieve more after self-doubt
1. Stop comparing yourself to others. Instead, evaluate what you bring to the table (i.e. your strengths, skills, talents, experience, track record etc) and leverage how you are different (i.e. how can your customers best benefit from what is different about you?) Feelings of insecurity can arise when we compare ourselves to others. But when we focus instead on our unique strengths and differentiators, we can aim to become better versions of ourselves instead of cheap imitations of someone else. As I prepared to speak at my first conference (see Part One), I found that comparing myself to other accomplished speakers discouraged me. But polishing my own presentation, making good use of my strengths and differences and expressing my own point of view helped me to stand out as uniquely me and attract opportunity.
You do not need validation from others; neither do you need to compare yourself to them. Focus on being the best version of you, because “you” is who you are equipped to be.
2. Regularly make a list of your strengths and how you deliver value through them.
For example, one of my strengths is clear communication. My readers, listeners, clients and past employers have all said, at one time or the other that I make complex things easier to understand and difficult tasks easier to carry out. They have said that I make things easier to remember with my metaphors, anecdotes, stories and humour. The value of this strength to my clients, readers and listeners is therefore facilitation and ease! With me on their team, they are inspired and motivated to do things faster, with less stress and more fun! Their dis-ease is relieved as I help speed up their progress!
Know your strengths and the value of each to your clients. This way, you can nip self-doubt in the bud because you know exactly what your customers value about your work and why they pay you.
3. Regularly obtain feedback from clients, readers, listeners, audience etc.
Ask them what they like about your business and how you can improve. When you know what your customers want, you can find ways to deliver it. And when you know how to give your customers what they want, you feel more confident and less vulnerable to nagging doubts. Remember to turn doubt into self-assessment. Take the time to reflect and use this assessment to find ways to do things better.
Positive customer feedback can help to boost your confidence and get rid of doubt. And if the feedback is not what you had hoped for, don’t take it personally. Take cues and improve your performance. Be proactive about collecting feedback; do not wait for your customers to provide it. Proactive feedback gathering shows that you care.
4. Get help! If you are unable to find your way forward through self doubt, get help from someone you trust, who can provide objective support. Sometimes, we need the strength of another person to overcome obstacles and move forward.
It is a strength to seek help when we need it, not a weakness. Why not tap into this strength proactively, by joining a mastermind group, hiring a coach or mentor or taking a course?
5. Keep a Wall of Fame!
Display your achievements and feedback on the wall to keep you reminded of how awesome you are! It is so easy to forget. Put up testimonials, certificates, press cuttings, published articles, your book cover or media art, pictures documenting your progress, pictures of satisfied clients, hang your plaques and awards here…anything providing evidence of how good you are at what you do and why you deserve recognition. Update your Wall of Fame regularly. Walk by it every day and take a look to increase self-belief.
Do not wait to feel doubt before you set up your wall of fame. Be proactive; set yours up today!
6. Replace negative people, hobbies, media and places with positive ones, to keep negative energy out and bring positive energy in!
Sometimes, the doubt comes from others around us. Friends who do not support our goals may try to discourage us from pursuing them. Family members, out of concern for our safety, may discourage us from stepping into the unknown. To move forward from this negativity, it will be necessary to distance ourselves from all that is negative and unsupportive. It may mean keeping our dreams to ourselves so that others cannot sabotage them. And then embracing more supportive people and hobbies, consuming empowering media and visiting the places that inspire us.
We become like the people we hang out with and media we consume. We can refuse to go with the negative flow by deciding what influences we allow and which ones to eliminate.
7. Use the power of the tongue!
Many of us let the power of the tongue work against us by making negative proclamations which become self-fulfilling prophecies. We can make our words work for us instead by speaking what we want into existence rather than speaking about what we do not want. We can stop entertaining self-put downs and replace them with affirmations and positive confessions. For instance, I have heard people say, “I am so stupid,” when they make a mistake or “I am so rubbish at this,” when they get something wrong. Pay attention to the things you say about yourself, even in jest, because our words become our reality. Say things like, “I am smart, capable and talented,” “I am an asset to my clients” and “I love who I am,” and watch your self-belief grow!
We get what we say, so let us commit to speaking only positive words to and about ourselves. Again, we can be proactive by choosing affirmations that inspire us and speaking them over our lives all through the day.
Self-doubt is NOT a bad thing if we turn it into self-assessment. And where we have been held back by the nagging doubts in our heads, these 7 steps will go a long way to set us free and launch us forward. Be empowered!
Do you need help with overcoming self-doubt, so you can embrace opportunity, even create opportunity, and reach forward to your dreams?
Do you wish to take your business forward and embrace bigger dreams, but feel held back in some way?
Perhaps you struggle with self-promotion, confidence issues, you don't know how to market your business or you are trying but are not just getting enough business.
I have experienced all these and have overcome these challenges. I would love to help you do the same.
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I offer both in-person and virtual half days, so there is something for everyone, wherever you are.
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"I tried you with my industry to see how you would bring your knowledge to bear in such an unusual field. Within five minutes of our conversation you said something and I knew THIS WAS IT! At that point I knew WE WERE THERE! Your listening skill is superb. I believe it did the magic for you in addressing my peculiar issue perfectly. For me, correct diagnosis of an ailment is key in the healing process. Thank you for the right-on-point, error-free-diagnosis.
S. Omopariola, Entertainer
"Before our session I was feeling doubts about handling certain of my target audience's issues. By the end of the session you made me feel confident and adequate to address these issues. I am now more optimistic as I can see the bigger picture of the scope of my work. Thanks also for the preparatory steps we outlined for my up-coming networking event. Our session helped me to create action steps in order to get things done."
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Don't let self-doubt, or anything else, hold you back one minute longer!
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